Thursday, May 12, 2005

Everyone knows that I hate bumperstickers. I don't care what kind of dog you have. I don't care who you voted for. I don't care if you're pro-choice or pro-life. I hate all of you dipshits even if I'm on your side. I know what I believe, and you're wrong.

Another thing I hate is vanity plates. I just don't see the fucking point, other than, once again, you think that you are way cooler than you actually are. But seriously, you're retarded, and your vanity plate isn't cute or funny or clever. I'll bet a bunch of these fucks are Christians, too. We say "vanity," but that's really just a form of pride, one of the seven deadly sins. Other than knowing that they would be burning in Hell over a license plate if any of that stupid bullshit was true, there's one other thing that does amuse me with those dumbass plates. I'll bet there comes a point when the person with their plates -- which they thought were so bloody special -- realizes just how lame they really are. Not only does their car have something dumb emblazoned on it for the rest of the world to see, but they're stuck with it unless if they go through the effort of having it changed.

And before you ask, yes, I considered getting vanity plates for the Bimmer. I was tempted to get something that had "ZHP" in it, but in the end, I didn't go for it.

I did see a couple of vanity plates that I had to give a slight bit of credit to this past weekend. One read "1IN1E6." At first I just ignored it. Then I was like, what the fuck does that mean? I thought about it for a second. Okay, 1IN -- one in. 1E6? Uhhhh... Oh yeah, one times ten to the sixth. One million. One in a million. Yeah, it's fucking stupid, but I don't think I've ever seen (intentional) scientific notation on a license plate before, so that gets a point or two.

The other plate I saw simple read "PUKE." Yup, that's it -- PUKE. It wasn't even an atrociously shitty car or anything, just this late-model blue Honda Civic that was in good condition. ETP suggested that maybe the name of the guy driving the car was Puke, pronounced "Pooh-kay." I'm guessing it wasn't. Puke.

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