Friday, February 17, 2006

Yahoo search:

she will fuck him to crack his nuts

Is this some kind of weird squirrel or elephant porn thing?
I usually get sick of the stupid shit that people put in their Slashdot sigs, but I found this one to be pretty amusing:

Vidi, Vici, Veni

Whack Palace

This is pretty hilarious. As if everyone doesn't know why you used such "tactics."

He said multiple visits were necessary so detectives could build trust with the operators.

Okay, dude, we get it -- your officers just wanted a little of that full release action. Doesn't bother me at all. Okay, sure, they're spending taxpayer money, but c'mon. These guys do a dangerous job and as such deserve a slightly less dangerous job in return.

The practice has been used in Spotsylvania since at least 2003.

Spotsylvania? Gee, I wonder what kind of spots those are.

Places like this should be left alone in the first place. Okay, I'm sure in some cases the girls working these joints are doing it out of some kind of coercion, but in pretty much any other case leave them alone. It's also pretty hypocritical for these cops to be busting these places as their visits were only ostensibly for law enforcement purposes, but such is life.
You know you've done something fucked up when even Mussolini calls you out. Okay, not Il Duce himself (it'd be pretty impressive if it was, though), but it's still an excuse to talk about Mussolini, who was a winner.

I think the only possible mitigating factor in raping someone in Italy is whether or not the rape positively impacted train schedules.
So I just read that Silk Stalkings, best show ever (or worst, you know, depending on how you look at it), has a handful of its seasons out on DVD right now. Unfortunately, all that's available at this point are the first four seasons, which means you're still firmly entrenched in Rob Testes territory. The important seasons are yet to come. Fuck, that show really should not have lasted eight seasons.

I hope this comment on IMDB was meant to be a joke:

My hobby is silk stalkings. I have taped the majority of the episodes. I will eventually tape all. I hope to see this show continue for years to come. You who work on it deserve two thumbs up, five stars and any other form of at-a-boy (girls). Thanks for giving the main enjoyment of my life.

"He's got a kick like Kwai Chang Caine."
- Dialogue from Silk Stalkings

Thursday, February 16, 2006

While we're on the subject of ejaculate, I may as well do a post on politics. There are a couple of non-issue issues that liberals are all up in arms over right now. One is the whole Jack Abramoff affair. I keep hearing about pictures of Bush with Abramoff surfacing. Wow, Bush is shaking hands with an Abramoff client with Abramoff appearing as an oh-so-incriminating "small, blurry, bearded figure in the background." Hello? Stop wasting time with irrelevant shit and follow the fucking money. I'm sure there's a real link out there that actually means something, but it's never gonna be found because we're wasting time on superficial nonsense.

The bigger story at the moment, however, is that Cheney shot some old fuck lawyer. But it's a big deal! Oh yes it is! They didn't tell anyone about it for almost a day! What the fuck do you expect from the most secretive and scripted White House in the history of mankind? No, that doesn't justify keeping it under wraps like they did. And yes, it is newsworthy when the most powerful man in the world shoots someone else. But is this really worth focusing on like we have? Maybe there's really a story here, but I don't see it at this point. Meanwhile, Bush and Cheney have taken plenty of actions that were not accidents that have led to the deaths of thousands (and counting) around the world, but yeah, we should make a big deal over Cheney being a lousy hunter.

Not really germane to the political discussion, but hunting is stupid. Go big tough guy, go.

Like usual, I've been over this before, but I'm tired of the left taking some small part of a much bigger picture and trying to make that little detail a much bigger deal than it really is, all at the expense of the broader issues. Talk about no sense of ambition or capacity for even moderately complex reasoning. Of course, we have the biggest fucking group of criminals we could have in charge right now, a bunch of people committing nothing but egregious offense after egregious offense against everything, and the left can't make shit out of any of it. It's fucking disgusting how many things Democrats could have gotten their hands on and run with, but they didn't because they're nothing but a bunch of goddamn sissy retards.
MSN Search:

porn girl being fucked by my little pony

This is horrible. In fact, this might be the most awful search hit I've ever gotten, and if you've been here more than six seconds you know I've gotten a lot of degernerate shit via search engines. To take something as innocent as My Little Pony and turn it into this is, well, it's expected based on where we're at as a society. But still. The only reason I'm posting this is because I've had my share of innocent things from my childhood runied by my and/or society's sicknesses, so I'm bringing you down with me.

And, okay, I'm also posting it because it is pretty funny in the way that most things are funny around here. But it's still an atrocious notion.

Take it all


Safe way to drown your girlfriend in cum!

Is there any such thing as a "safe" way to drown in cum (or anything for that matter)? Isn't drowning unsafe by it's very nature? I know, I know, the "safe" they're talking about is probably a supposedly safe pill or something for increasing ejaculation volume. But this here tells you all you need to know about what a bunch of fucking cretins guys are.

As a corollary to that, I'm still sick of this whole supposed obsession over ejaculation volume. Why would you care? Oh, because you're a guy and you think this is for some reason necessary. Guys, trust me -- the less mess you make, the better. I'm sure it's so pleasing for most women to have an even bigger, sticky mess to deal with, especially if they have self-esteem and/or an education.

Speaking of spam, I'm sick of the messages getting to me that have "POTENTIAL SPAM" in the subject line. Look, if you have to demarcate something as "potential" spam, it's spam. The thing that pisses me off the most is that GMail's spam filter will actually pass a lot of these through to my inbox instead of right to the spam folder. This is what we get from a bunch of supposed geniuses? Fuck software people.