Friday, May 05, 2006

We used to hate people. Now we just make fun of them. It's more effective that way.

Except that it's not. Seriously, this is what we've been reduced to? We can't catch or kill this guy, and we can't do anything to come close to stopping all of the shit that's going on over there, so we'll just resort to trying to embarrass them. Great. Proud to be an American.

Lynch was asked how al-Zarqawi can be a "terror mastermind" if he can't handle a firearm.
"Why he's their leader, I don't know."

I think Bush himself has proven that you don't need to be an actual genius to convince a bunch of retards that you're really smart and capable. When you're having other people do all the dirty work -- which simply amounts to blowing shit up -- it seems to be pretty easy. Maybe al-Zarqawi really is some kind of mastermind. Or maybe he just had Terrell Davis and John Elway. Or IEDs; I get confused easily. But yeah, if he's actually a dumbass, then they just learned really well from the example our "leader" has set.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Not that anyone gives a shit, but in case if you're old school and don't bookmark and want to save some typing, you can now get to this crappy 'blog via in addition to the existing address. Kinda pointless since it just redirects you to blogspot, but I almost feel like I could maybe consider thiknking about pretending to be legit someday now that I've got the rights to the .com, so I just felt the need to let everyone know.

To whom it may concern,

Let us inform you that MNS, Inc starts a new project in the USA and is looking for a reliable, well-motivated and well-executive person to take care of the project's needs. The job requires a flexible schedule shift.

According to this fact we are offering you a position of the Executive Manager of MNS, Inc. If you are interested in starting business activity or searching a secure managing job, please response this message for more detailed description of the opportunity with your CV or Resume attached to the message. Please forward all your questions and comments to

With due respect,
Human resources department of MNS, Inc.

I'm a little afraid to response this e-mail because I'm still in awe at finding out I'm a well-executive person but never knew it. And why the fuck do I need to give them my resume if they're already offering me the job? Is this the same company I was working for that couldn't hire me because I didn't have a diploma?

P.S. to anyone getting here via a search engine: If you got the above e-mail or something similar and thought it was legitimate, you're an moron.
How much do you wanna bet that the DA in this case was rejected by an Asian girl he was pursuing at some point in his life? Dude, we get that she committed a really fucked up crime, but c'mon.

They had threatened to sell her piano if she did not win a state-wide competition, she wrote.

She said they had grounded her for scoring only 96% in an exam.

And, when she disappointed them, she said they had forced her to stand naked in a corner.

If that's all true, tell me the mother wasn't asking for it. I'm not saying she shoulda killed her, but I understand. Berating a kid for getting 96 on an exam? That's the kind of shit I used to do to myself in high school, and back then I was even more in need of a beating than I am now.

But yeah, having to deal with that shit as a teen, and a lot of people will probably snap at some point. Sure, they're not all gonna hack their parents up, but still. It seems more like there are extenuating circumstances here that full-on, balls-out prison isn't exactly the right answer for. She might not be a danger to others (except maybe her dad) at this point, but who knows what over eight years inside will do to her. Or maybe she really was just a psychopath all along; who knows. I'd be interested to see the psych evaluations on her. Because, you know, psychologists and psychiatrists are a real useful bunch, what with that exact science of theirs.

And yes, maybe some of my thinking is motivated by the fact that a decently good-looking Asian girl is going to rot in prison over this, and that in and of itself seems like such a waste. I'll admit that.

I found some links to her 'blog stuff at the bottom of this page. Haven't read through too much, but yeah, mostly just the kind of teen shit you'd expect from the looks of it.

Speaking of killers with 'blogs, those in the states probably heard about that nutjob in Oklahoma who killed that 10-year-old girl a couple weeks back. If you don't know the story, seriously, you'd probably rather not know. I was gonna comment on it before, but considering my track record on certain things (see last post), it just felt awkward. Anyway, I tracked down his blog after CNN showed a screenshot of it. If you're so inclined, you can kill some time reading through his shit. I just re-read that last sentence, and I realized that "kill some time" was probably not the best choice of words I could have used there.

I read back a couple of years, and yeah, the guy was messed up. Hated his life, hated his jobs, and was just an out-and-out lonely loser. He doesn't give any real indications what he's planning, but you can tell he has some serious problems (no shit, BLM; thanks for the newsflash). Obviously has some issues with his mother, he won't get his shit in gear with anything, and then there was this girl he met online several years back who he was going to move out to California to live with until she called it off at the last minute. So yeah, years of being a total wreck capped off with that, and here we are. Of course, in Esmie's case, I can make the argument for cutting her some slack, but not in this guy's case. Yes, I feel as if I have to specifically point out my stance on this, because I can be a bit nebulous as to exactly how fucked up I am.

One thing that got quoted a lot in news stories was this:

He mentions cannibalism, asking "If you were a cannibal, what would you wear to dinner?" and responding: "The skin of last night's main course."

This kinda pissed me off once I saw where that was located on his 'blog -- in the Blogger profile. The question was one of the random, stupid-ass questions that the profile generator asks. He didn't ask the question, Blogger did. I'm not saying it isn't of interest that he left this up there, but does Blogger get some kind of assist on this crime? The subtle misrepresentation of a psycho who needs no misrepresentation really irked me.

The worst thing about his 'blog, though, are the comments, of which there are naturally a ton of that were left after he committed the crime and people found his 'blog. Why must people insist on saying stupid shit like that? Never mind the fact that he's never going to read any of the inane comments. That's my favorite thing about this country; our ability to turn an awful tragedy into an even bigger travesty when we inevitably flaunt our collective stupidity for all to see.

The downside of being better than everyone else is that people tend to assume you're pretentious.

When I see a headline such as this one in CNN's "Entertainment" section, it should really turn out much more entertaining than an article about a probably-shitty pretensionfest of a band.

I actually debated whether or not I should publish this because of, you know, but once I busted out "pretensionfest" it gave me a great idea. The great idea, of course, is PretensionFest. How cool would this be? Just me and the other pretentious assholes I like doing what we do best. I don't like most people who are pretentious, but I sure enjoy being pretentious.

Woo hoo! A post!

There are few people dumber There are a lot of stupid people in the world, but this couple gets the prize for the day. Not too long ago you had triplets, yet you continued to fuck without something getting snipped or tied? The only good thing about this article was that the word "miracle" wasn't mentioned anywhere. In fact:

With a tiny baby in each arm, Sharon Fontana said she's ready for motherhood -- times six.

"I am, I guess. I don't have much choice."

There's enthusiasm. And technically, you have lots of choices.

Of course, on top of letting this happen in the first place, these people gave each set of triplets names that all start with the same initial. Rich and Sharon Fontana, you are assholes.