Friday, June 23, 2006

And one time, I fucked a 68-year-old guy in the ass in front of his kids

Originally, I thought I was going to get off a naughty post that didn't involve some kind of child abuse, but then I had to go and remember some shit from about a decade ago on an Adam Sandler CD. Anyway...

Ten-year hard-on. That needs to be a band name.

The Dura-II is designed to allow impotent men to position the penis upward for sex, then lower it.

I just picture some sort of lever or hand crank that makes it go up. It's funny if I can put "68-year-old cock" out of my mind, and even still that can't ruin the humor value of this contraption. The only thing that could make that more hilarious is if it made that sound from The Six Million Dollar Man when you raised it.


After apparently having been given the green light for an underage common-law wife, I guess you can't win 'em all. Fucking conservative Canadian government. Yeah, yeah, I suppose it's a good idea.

Canada: No sex please until we're 16

That has gotta be the dumbest headline ever. Some of those girls want it. What?

The federation, formerly Planned Parenthood, has said there is no evidence that raising the age of consent will improve protection for young people...

Considering the last two posts and a good deal of my body of work (and I use the term "work" loosely), I am not coming from a standpoint of credibility, but they may have a point there.

... and warned it may discourage young people from seeking out birth control options or other assistance.

But that might be pushing it. Planned Parenthood, ERRRRR, the Canadian Federation for Sexual Health: Pro-abortion, pro-sex with 14-year-olds. That's a prime directive I can get on board with.

And just since it's relevant, here's a link to Aside from that time I told guys to be vigilant about checking for ball cancer, this is as close as I get to a public service announcement.