Sunday, August 14, 2005

Yes, I've been swimming in raw sewage... I love it!

Okay, so I was just looking around the Crocs website, and I came across this model, which is still unacceptable -- ugly is ugly. Get yourself some real fucking shoes. Then there was this customer testimonaial on the page:

"We just went to Cozumel, Mexico and we were hit by Hurricaine Emily. We had to evacuate our hotel before it hit & knew that our Crocs would be our best protective & most comfortable shoe. We were in a hurricane shelter for 2 days & 2 nights & never took our Crocs off except to sleep. The conditions were awful with no running water or toilet facilites & the bathroom floors were covered with overflow from the toilets. But we were known around the shelter as "that Croc family". Most of the Americans had never seen Crocs or heard of them before that horrific incident. We were asked at least once an hour where we got our Crocs & where they could get some. I, of course, proudly told them to got to the Crocs website & did a little promotional all about our Crocs. We were so blessed to have worn them & they even saved my feet from a 2 inch piece of glass that I pulled out of the sole of my Croc, but it never went through to my foot. When we finally made it home, I threw them in the washing machine, shined them up & they look great. Through it all they protected our feet from every kind of danger in the streets, kept us cooler, & even with the bathroom conditions the way they were, they never smelled. Thank you for Crocs, We Love Them."

Wow, nothing says "I want some of those ugly pieces of shit" like thinking about actual pieces of shit all over the bathroom floor. And you know, they have a bunch of holes in them, and they pretty much just slip on. I don't see that keeping your feet very clean once that, uh, overflow gets too deep or starts splashing around. And when you got home, you just washed them? You were traipsing around in other people's piss and shit, and you put them in your suitcase and then brought them home and put them in the washing machine? Your family is disgusting. Personally, I would have set them on fire and left them back in Mexico. Assuming, of course, that I had been dumb enough to buy them in the first place, which I wouldn't have been.

What kind of idiot lets themselves and their family get stuck in a hurricane, anyway? I wouldn't take shit from hurricanes -- I would punch every hurricane in the face.

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