It's been pretty difficult to get myself motivated to 'blog for a long time and even harder since I got serious about using Twitter. That last part alone makes me want to punch myself in the face. Anyway, I may not 'blog that much, but when I get a chance I will post something written by Carville, because that weird-looking motherfucker cracks me up.

It's nice to see that the Republicans have their limits. After years of calling Obama a nazi, a socialist, questioning his religion and where he was born, saying he's destroying America... And of course those are just the things they will say in public. But a depiction of Obama as a zombie with a bullet hole in his head, that's too far. Good to know.

Yeah, so at this juncture it looks like I was wrong about Perry being a force in the Republican presidential field. That man is an idiot. Out of the past two governors of Texas he appears to be the dumbest.

Yeah, I was off the mark about Perry. Just like I was wrong about Newt being a potential cure for what ails the Republican party. In case it wasn't obvious I don't know what the fuck I'm talking about when it comes to politics. Well, politics and pretty much anything else come to think of it. That's one of the great things about being a blogger with a blog that no one reads, though: you don't have to know shit about shit and you can just run your mouth and never back anything up. Which, actually still sounds like a recipe to be a political pundit on TV. Where the fuck's my money and airtime?

Anyway, I think basically if we want a candidate to go in the shitter, all we need is for me to say that they are a solid candidate. So Herman Cain? Well I'm still convinced that there's no way he will keep any real momentum going. As I've mentioned before Republicans of all people are not going to vote in the second black president in history (this one being fully black AFAIK). Does that make me racist? Don't care. No way I'm not right on this one.

So as we await Herman Cain's inevitable nomination, and also speaking of punditry, some that is at least funny, Carville.

Carville cracks me up. Yeah, this is a totally pointless excuse for taking cheap shots at the Republican candidates, and, well, I guess you don't really need an excuse to do that. Well done, Jimbo.

So the Democrats are going to lose Ted Kennedy's Senate seat. That is hilarious. Hope you enjoyed that supermajority while it lasted, dumbasses. You guys could not be more limp-dicked of an organization.

OK so I was totally thinking about commenting on the whole Harry Reid thing a couple days back when it was quasi-relevant but like usual I was lazy. Fortunately, the second quote of this Onion bit pretty much sums up everything I wanted to say about it anyway.

At last our long national nightmare is finally over

I wonder which left-wing publication will be the first to use that after Tuesday. Or maybe it's better to ask which ones will be able to refrain. Either way, of course, The Onion was way out ahead when it came to milking that shit. Pretty fucked up just how accurate that headline was back in January of '01. Le sigh.

Anyway, in a few hours we'll be past all that shit and everything will immediately be kittens and roses. In honor of today's historic event, I offer this which I found online:

Well, I still don't really know what to think about all this. Aside from, what a cluster fuck.

Republican leaders, who had pushed their reluctant members to vote for the bill, pointed the finger for the failure at a speech given Monday by Speaker Nancy Pelosi, D-Calif.

What? 'Cause of a speech? What a load. Either that's bullshit or you're all just children.

Pelosi, speaking on the House floor, had blamed the nation's economic problems on "failed Bush economic policies."

Okay, so it's bullshit and you're all just children. Not voting for something 'cause of a speech -- lame. Using this opportunity as another chance to regurgitate campaign talking points -- lame.

Here's a quandary. A lot of Republicans are against this. So does that mean it must be a good thing? Or does the fact that they're against handing out a bunch of money to these firms a sign of just how fucked up the bailout proposal really is? "We're all about helpin' Whitey, but damn."

Something is amiss.

If you're wondering what the hell that loud bang was that you just heard, it was the sound of the hypocrisy barrier being broken.

This is fucking stupid. Phony outrage, indeed.

Not that I give a fuck about what celebrities have to say about politics, but now we know one thing: Sarah Palin will not be fucking Matt Damon.

So I guess I'm motivated to talk politics again. Shit.

Since we're at it, I'm more than a little sick and tired of this rubbish. Look, I have no problems with Lieberman supporting McCain. I hate the notion of party above all else and I applaud people speaking out for what they think is the right thing, even if they're wrong. There's always something to be said for honesty. So be consistent, Lieberman, and if you're gonna be a Republican, call yourself one.

Lieberman is a douche. Yeah, just about everything I say and do goes against most of the Democratic party, but look at me everyone, I'm a Democrat! Well, sure, as long as caucusing with them gets you a prestigious committee chairmanship. Fuck you, Joe.

"The Democratic Caucus will reassess the situation with Sen. Lieberman after the election," Jim Manley, a spokesman for Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, said Wednesday.

In other words, if we don't need him anymore, we'll kick his ass to the curb. Lieberman is using the Democratic party for his own self-aggrandizement, but of course they're just using him for theirs. As per usual here, I'm not saying anything ground breaking, but I needed to vent because I'm sick of this crap too. It's OK, though -- either Mavericks, Inc. or Hope on a Rope will save us come January.

Well, there's a decent chance the choice of Palin was brilliant, for non-aesthetic reasons that is. The Republicans can always count on one thing being certain: that the Democrats will be pussies.

Obama's campaign has begun airing its first ad that includes Palin, but it never criticizes her or even mentions her name.

Yup, they're afraid to go after her. Well, it is still early, and they didn't exactly have a ton of time to pull together the first ad going against the full ticket now that it's been decided. Then again:

An Obama spokesman had reacted to the announcement that McCain had picked Palin as his running mate Friday with a statement that called her "the former mayor of a town of 9,000, with zero foreign policy experience."

Obama, who later complimented Palin in a statement, backed away from the criticism. "I think, you know, campaigns start getting these hair triggers," he said. "And the statement that Joe [Biden] and I put out reflects our sentiments."

Yeah, not exactly coming out swinging. Of course, Obama is understandably playing it safe with the whole experience issue, since, well. As that Weekly Standard piece I linked pointed out, Palin's inexperience, while not a help to her, just helps to further magnify Obama's qualifications or lack thereof.

It seems like the Democrats have an open avenue considering that she's supposedly a big ethics reformer but is currently under investigation in her own state. Maybe firing somebody for not firing somebody else that you have a family beef with just isn't that big of a deal, or there's not as much of a story there as there might seem, or the Democrats just don't know what the fuck to do like always.

So I just watched Hillary's speech at the Democratic National Circlejerk tonight. Unfortunately for Hillary, throughout the course of her speech she made it quite clear as to why she lost the nomination -- she's a fucking robot. You know, we've come a long way in this country. We've come to the point where we'll talk about electing a black man president. Half black. Anyway, we've come a long way, but we just haven't come far enough to elect a robot president. Sorry, HRC-9000.

The most important part of her speech, well, maybe the only important part of her speech (from a D standpoint, at least) was when she asked "Were you in this for me, or were you in this for blah blah blah" (insert stories of people she probably made up). That should have been her whole speech: "I lost. Get over it, fuckers. Support this guy or you're dumb." Can you believe all these d-bags who won't let it go? 'Course you can. But really, that's just sad. Either you can't deal with the fact that your chosen one lost, and/or you're a racist.

Another thing I'm already tired of: people getting weepy or even just misty-eyed while someone is speaking. If this is the kind of shit that touches you, if this is the kind of shit that stirs emotion in you, you're a loser.

Then there was the religious pandering... Jesus. And what was with those Asians giving the closing benediction? Supposedly they were from Aurora. There are no Asians in A-Town, you retards! What the fuck is with a closing benediction, anyway? Lame.

I will give Hillary credit for one thing, though, and that's the fact that she was able to keep her shit together and not like start breathing fire and eating people alive. How pissed do you think she must be? Looking forward eight months ago this week in Denver was supposed to be her coronation, and here she's stuck playing third fiddle, since aside from Obama you know Bill will steal the entire show when he speaks tomorrow. I guess it could be worse; if she had gotten the nomination then she'd be stuck getting upstaged by Bill at her own convention.

Speaking of Bubba, I'm not really planning to tune into much more of the Democratic strokefest, but I would like to see his speech just because it will be pretty hilarious to see people going nuts over him. And while Clinton's lost a few steps these past few years I'm guessing he still knows how to please. Speaking of which, I'll bet he's trolling the streets of Denver right now picking up tail.

I'm also hoping to catch Biden's speech as well. Personally I thought Bill Richardson was the most solid guy for Obama to pick, but Biden's a pretty good choice too. I could swear there was some kind of deal-breaker that soured me on Biden at one point but hell if I can remember what it was, and anytime I listen to the guy I'm pretty much on board with him. Finally, anyone who will call "bullshit" by actually using the word "bullshit" without apology is definitely garnering some points in my book.