Fucking weak. I know we have made a bit of progress on this front but I still really hate where we are at as a country on a lot of things. As far as I know there were no real issues with running the Focus on the Family ads, so there's a nice little double standard to add to the pile of crap.

OK so after saying I don't really care about the Olympics anymore here's two skating posts back to back. Hey, I do still like the sport, I just have less of a vested interest now. Anyway, this pseudo-controversy is completely missing the most important fact: ice dancing is retarded. Seriously, fuck that shit. All it is is pairs without any of the hard stuff. I like real figure skating, not ice dancing.

Also, fuck everyone. I am so tired of every single fucking group out there just waiting for a reason to bitch about how they're being offended. You know, sometimes the complaints are totally legit, OK? And furthermore everyone has a right to be pissed and express their opinion about whatever. But usually people just need to relax and shut the fuck up. Everyone really needs to stop being so proud of their culture or their art or their whatever 'cause guess what? It mostly all sucks anyway. So get over it and get over yourselves. Jesus.

Everyone out there just waiting for false persecution to befall them needs to take a huge lesson from Jewish comedians. I may think their religion is stupid, but I totally respect how they can have their beliefs and be serious in them but at the same time laugh about them and not take things too seriously. Let's follow that example, eh?

I know what you're thinking. What if those weak-ass ice dancers went out there in blackface? Well that's not gonna happen 'cause they know black people have guns and they can't get away with shit like that. No one is afraid Aborigines. I mean; please.

The question about blackface is actually a pretty good retort but for starters I couldn't resist throwing out some humor. Humor in somewhat poor taste, yeah, but I know some of you are laughing. And of course I'm just joking about the black people all having guns thing but that helps bring me to a broader point. The thing is, you know, I really don't see what the problem is with making jokes like I just did or laughing at jokes like that. Obviously I would think that because I'm an asshole trying to justify my behavior but just work with me here alright.

Aboriginal costumes or blackface or whatever I think it's all OK. Yeah it may be shitty and it may be racist and it may be coming from a very lousy part of a total asshole. But it's all free speech. The whole point behind free speech is allowing people to say something that you might not like. There's no point in protecting speech that doesn't bother anyone. Everyone talks a good game about how they may disagree with someone but they defend to their death their right to say it blah blah blah. Of course a lot of people don't fully believe that; they really wish there was a way to shut people up who disagree with them. And again, that's the whole point behind laws protecting free speech.

Plus in the end, the words or dance routines or whatever aren't really hurting anyone, are they? What if you just ignored stuff like that? Would it go away? Umm, yeah, actually it would in many cases. The only reason stuff like that is hurtful or offensive is because people allow it to be. Words are just words until you let them be more, and if we all just stopped caring about shit like that our lives would be a lot more pleasant. Let the morons be morons and eventually they're just gonna go away anyway. Until those morons are making laws that truly are offensive then just let it go. It's when it comes to real actions that oppress people and take away their rights that I think shit's a problem. That's when people need to be up in arms and getting pissed.

Oh and one more thing. A lot of people who bitch about stuff like this dumbass ice dancing thing aren't really offended, they're just looking for attention. They just want some kind of excuse to run their mouths and let everyone know about their ultra-important opinions. These are some of the finest assholes we have amongst us, and they too need to just shut the fuck up.

I realize that I've said repeatedly that people need to shut the fuck up in one paragraph while in the very next I'm also talking up a good game about free speech rights. The thing is, I really do believe that people have every right to be douchebags and spew their opinions, but it would be so awesome if they could just put their efforts elsewhere towards something more worthwhile. Yes, this of course goes for me too. When I say people should stop talking what I am really trying to get at is that we all just need to relax more and follow the lead of our Jew comic brothers and sisters.

I think the best way to sum up my feelings here is to borrow some words of wisdom from ShitMyDadSays:

"Don't ever say stuff just because you think you should. That's the definition of an asshole."

Well, fuck. At least I don't really have to care about the Olympics anymore. Sure there is gonna be some stuff that interests me but it's just not gonna be the same.

This is pretty amusing: ShitMyDadSays. As described by the guy who runs that feed:

"I'm 29. I live with my 74-year-old dad. He is awesome. I just write down shit that he says"

Also available on Failbook if you have such leanings.

Wait... Cindy McCain is cool? OK I really don't know much else about her other than she's loaded and looks really creepy but this is a big point in her favor.

So the Democrats are going to lose Ted Kennedy's Senate seat. That is hilarious. Hope you enjoyed that supermajority while it lasted, dumbasses. You guys could not be more limp-dicked of an organization.

Hey so is whoever commented on this post still around? Or how about anyone else who has commented in, like, the past year or so? I mean besides ETP; I know he'll wander past here eventually and be like, whoa, you're blogging again.

And hey, how about some newbies? C'mon, people. Step it up.

Kinda sad that this is where we're at with the whole Bin Laden thing -- it's been so fucking long that we're having to do age progressions on him to imagine what he looks like as he sits in a fucking cave someplace these days.

So this post may seem a bit out of place amongst all the bitching but if you think I'm real worried about my rep you probably just got here.

If you are a lazy-ass but have at least a marginal sense of humanity and would like to donate to the disaster relief efforts in Haiti you can text 'Haiti' to 90999. Ten bucks will be donated to the Red Cross and charged to your phone bill for each text. It's totally legit; you can read about it at the bottom of this article which also has info on other charitable organizations. Ten dollars might not seem like much but they've already raised like five mill this way so it really does add up.

I even donated and I don't ever do anything for anyone else because I am selfish but they have just made it too easy on us assholes. You even get to feel a little good about yourself because there's no such thing as true altruism (except maybe under some extreme circumstances) but that's really a discussion for another time.

Thanks to modern technology you basically have no excuse for not doing something.