Saturday, August 30, 2003

Hey, so I'm decently good with grammar and stuff. Seriously. If you ever read a post which doesn't make sense, or has some obvious spelling errors or whatever, hit reload a few times. Hey, I said if the post is incoherent, not shitty. I have this habit of writing a post, posting it, then proofreading it. I tend to do about 200 iterations before I get the post just how I want it.

Why do I do this? Basically because this allows me to have my shitty website on the "10 Most Recently Published Blogs" list on one of Blogger's webpages over and over again. So far, it's one of the best marketing tactics I've come up with, because it seems to generate a decent number of hits. Sometimes, I'll just make a minor change or no change at all just to get the link up there.

Hey, don't call me desperate for attention, pigfucker.

Okay, seriously, I'm going to bed now.
Okay, so remember my probably mostly useless WWDN ad campaign? I don't know why I'm bringing that up, expcept maybe to put in context the fact that WWDN has text ads. Of course, if you know about my ad, you already know this fact. Either way, why you would give a fuck, I don't know, but it's past 5 AM, and I'm not exactly what we'd call "fully coherent." No, not drunk or in any other chemically altered state, just tired. So you're like, "why don't you just fucking go to sleep, dumbass?" And I'm like, "well, I would, if you'd get off my fucking ass and let me finish this post."

Huh? What the fuck was I talking about? Oh yeah.

Anyway, I come across this text ad that says some bullshit like "When was the last time... she totally melted for you?" And I'm saying to myself, what? I never dated the Wicked Witch of the West. But for the fuck of it, I decided to see what the hell it was about.

You know what it turns out this cocksucker is selling? A book on how to score with women. You know what the first thing that comes to mind is? Those shitty advice articles in Maxim, Stuff, and the like on how to score with women. God, are those things pathetic. About the only thing more pathetic has gotta be the guy who follows those advice articles. I knew a guy who thought those magazines gave good advice; he's dead now.

Honestly, if I'm going to crash and burn, which I will on the rare occasion I muster up the courage to talk to someone I'm interested in, I might as well crash and burn on my own lack of skills. No sense crashing and burning on someone else's lack of skills.

To cast aside sarcasm for a minute (don't get too used to this), it's bullshit like this that has me disillusioned on the whole dating thing anyway. It seems like it's all about playing games, and not being yourself. The fact that Maxim advice and stupid books like the one I came across this morning are a testament to that. Granted, I'm not going to get anyone being myself. I know you must be saying "What? A nice, personable, mild-mannered guy like you?" (see, sarcasm's back). But as Captain Picard said, "If we're going to be damned, let's be damned for who we really are." Oh, yeah. Star Trek quotes. That gets 'em wet.

Okay, enough self-deprecation and feeling sorry for myself. On with the show.

What always makes me laugh and roll my eyes is that a lot of those surefire pussy getters are written by a "woman," so you instantly know it must work if it was written by a woman. I think I would actually trust it less if it were written by a woman. Seriously, I would just say to myself "Okay, maybe this works... On her." This isn't a crack on women, but they're all so different and can't make up their minds anyway, making one woman's advice is completely useless when applied to another woman. One woman likes this, another woman likes that. There's just no consistency to make most "advice" worthwhile.

Okay, so I guess that was kind of a crack on women. Why you gotta be like 'dat, baby?
I... I think I know this guy...

Friday, August 29, 2003

Man, have the last few gas fill-ups been painful. I just love being dependent on foreign oil. Well, I'm always torn between wanting to complain, and realizing that it's like Bill Maher says - gas prices may go up, but when you think about it, it's not all that bad. I do a lot of driving, but I'm fortunate enough to get better gas mileage than god in my car.

It'd just be nice if we could get our shit together and not have to worry so much about it. I'm not really even that concerned with paying more for gas, I'm more concerned with how this country has sould its soul for cheap oil. Concerned with all the fucking trouble we get ourselves into to keep the oil companies and our Middle East "allies" happy. And just a teency bit worried what happens when we run out of dead dinosaurs to run our Ford Fuck You Mobiles.
Oh, good. The stories supporting how things are under control just keep rolling in.
You know what sucks? I can't find the "Tecmo Super Bowl Ate My Balls" webpage anymore. Also, it looks like quite a few of Krazy Keith's Ate My Balls links that we came across like 5 years ago are dead now. It's never going to be good again.

Thursday, August 28, 2003

So, time to give mad props to some more people who have written and/or linked me. I may be an asshole, but I at least try and give credit where credit is due. I don't know what's wrong with these people, but whatever it is I'm glad for it.

I got a great e-mail from Goody a few nights ago. In addition to the 'blog, her up and coming website is located here.

This guy thinks Fuck Everything is the "angriest blog on the planet." That, right there, is a compliment.

Finally, a big thanks to the 'blogmaster over at insinuendo for the front page link.
Yeah, we are so totally shithammered here. Is there any way we can turn this mess around? Hell, even if Bush is voted out of office, we still have this huge pile of rubbish that is going to have to be cleaned up.
Gee, I just love drug companies.
Nice to see all the little children getting along.
Mississippi, in a surprise move...

It's sick how much support and publicity Moore is getting. Not like I'm helping, but not like keeping silent would change anything. Well, this bullshit worked for him once before, propelling him to the head of Alabama's Supreme court, so I'm sure he's thinking why not try it again?

"I had hoped and prayed that the courts would stand up for our rights..." Yeah, asshole, shouldn't that tell you that not even God is on your side?
So has anyone else been following the saga of Dr. David Kelly over in Britain? There's an inquiry into the affair going on right now, the Hutton Inquiry. For anyone who hasn't heard of this mess, at one point, the BBC was running a story saying that Tony Blair's government had "sexed up" its intelligence on Iraq, in particular a claim that Iraq could launch an attack within 45 minutes as part of the infamous "dossier" that Tony Blair presented. Of course, belief that intelligence on Iraq was doctored to make Iraq look like a bigger threat than it really was is nothing new, but it was leaked that the BBC's source was a British Ministry of Defence official. Dr. David Kelly, and MoD weapons advisor, was named as the BBC's source, a claim denied by the BBC. He began undergoing questioning by an inquiry board, and not too long after being thrust into the unpleasant spotlight, he was found dead in a field with his wrists slashed.

The Hutton Inquiry once again has Tony Blair in hot water. Like usual, I can't help but feel a little sorry for Tony. Maybe he really is just evil, but the guy is obviously smarter than some world leaders I can name, and he at least puts on a good show that he's helping us in Iraq because he really feels it's the right thing to do. Of course, I'm also convinced that he just wants to ride American coattails to glory, so in the end, whatever happens to him is his fault.

The thing that really pisses me off is that Tony Blair is taking all the heat for this issue alone. Bush, on the other hand, has had to deal with a little media badgering here and there, but hasn't had to put up with as much shit as Mr. Blair. I'm pretty sure that's the case, because I don't read as much British press as American, and it still seems like someone is always riding Tony's ass over Iraq, and probably rightly so. Still, I can't help but be irritated that the guy who seems intelligent and seems to at least partly be doing this for the right reasons is having to share the blame all alone. Meanwhile, our dumbass head of government (I hate referring to Bush as 'President', if you haven't noticed) who is fucking stupid and/or just plain evil isn't having anywhere near as difficult a time as he deserves.
The latest on the talks with North Korea... Which isn't much.

Wednesday, August 27, 2003

Again, an example of what separates the hacks (like me) from real journalists (like Dowd).
Holy fucking shit. I just fucking KNEW that I got stiffed way back in the 80's. This is what I've been waiting my whole life for. The Gadgetmobile. And it looks like it's in shitty condition, too. Bonus!
You know what, you guys? It sounds like you've got other shit to deal with. We won't mind if you just punt on this one.
So you know how I'm always harping on how "The neocons are up to evil shit, but we never know until it's too late"? I haven't been real good on going on the offensive and reading more conservative press, obviously. Today though, I realized I may have already hit on the "next big thing" a long time ago.

I'm driving in to work today, and I can't get the words "single-party state" out of my head. I mentioned this before, way back on May 8th. In late June, Paul Krugman had an editorial in The New York Times about the possibility of becoming a one-party state. At least one journalist from a major newspaper has discussed this, so I know I can't be completely crazy for thinking it.

You don't think it's possible? We have a Republican President, a Republican House, and a Republican Senate. We have a press that seems to be terrified of going after the Republican-led government. We have a weak, divided "opposition" in the Democrats. Sounds like we could be well on our way.

Furthermore, we have a consolidation of power taking place. The Republicans got into office, and have used September 11th to galvanize their strength. September 11th could end up being our Reichstag fire.

Of course, we would never have a death camp, charismatic-leader type single party state. No, this is America, where we're good at illusion and lying to ourselves. The Democrats would still be around, but they'd be even more diminished than they are today. Propaganda is an obvious entity that we already have plenty of. There wouldn't be any "thought police," but plenty of pseudo-patriotic and religious rhetoric to try and keep us in line. Again, something we already have plenty of. And there would be plenty more bullshit efforts like the one to codify in law that marriage should only be between a man and a woman. One party enforcing their laws, their policies, their morals, and their beliefs.

The Republicans are smart, and they're patient - just like terrorists. They know that it's going to take some time to get where they want to be, and they're willing to work and to wait.

Everyone knows I'm not fond of the GOP, and I'm sure this just looks like yet another attack on them. But we cannot let the GOP become the "dominant governing party in the country for a generation" as Karl Rove would like. Effective single party rule would be indescribably bad, no matter where you are on the political spectrum. Of course, ask Republicans, and none of them would admit how much they'd love this single-party scenario. Just like a company that repeats the mantra of "competition is good," when they know full well how nice having a monopoly is when they can get away with it.

The only hope of putting a kink in their plans is to vote Bush out of office next November. It pains me to say it, because they're weak and I hate them too, but the Democrats are our only hope. The problem is, I'm afraid that if the Democrats actually started taking a stand and taking action, it could backfire and they could be left even weaker than before. The Republicans are masters of letting the Democrats fuck themselves, and I'm afraid that even if the Dems did the right thing, they could end up accelerating exactly what I fear. Furthermore, even if Bush was pushed out, it may not completely derail what's been going on, only delaying the inevitable.

I hope I am just crazy, and this is just the ranting of someone who doesn't know shit about politics. But we are so totally fucked if I'm right, so I'm not letting go of this.
The saga continues. Lots of random comments on this one.

Nearly one in five people polled are against removing the monument? How fucking stupid are we? I'll tell 'ya - real goddamn stupid.

What is this pussy shit that it's been moved? You're supposed to be getting it the fuck out of there, end of story.

"It is a sad day in our country when the moral foundation of our law and the acknowledgment of God has to be hidden from public view..." No, you fucking asshole, being "hidden from public view" is not the issue. I sincerely doubt that Christianity is going to be forced underground because of this. The government may be Judeo-Christian biased, BUT IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO BE PUTTING THAT BIAS ON DISPLAY FOR EVERYONE TO SEE!.

Calling for people to come see "where the 10 Commandments once stood"? How fucking bankrupt are these peoples' lives? I'll tell 'ya - reall goddamn bankrupt. You brought your whole family from Alaska for this shit? Get the fuck out of here and go back to work.

"I think they're going to be sorry they cooperated with this act." What kind of an asshole makes bullshit threats like this? An ignorant, Christian asshole, that's what kind. All that this guy and the rest of Moore's followers care about is pushing their beliefs on everyone else and seeing those beliefs being reinforced in public forum just so everyone can see how wonderful and holy they are.

Here's another article that says people were praying while laying face-down on the pavement. Speaking of bullshit threats, I think it's Michelin-on-Skull Time!

Four men linking arms and chanting? Sounds pretty fucking gay for a bunch of Christian Conservatives.

"They can move it out of view, but they can't move it out of our hearts." That's the FUCKING POINT, asshole! No one is trying to remove God, or the Commandments, or any of that bullshit from your heart. They're just trying to maintain Separation of Church and State, not Separation of Church and Joe Christian.

Okay, that's it. Enough cheap shots from me; I'm tired.
Why don't men watch women's sports? Because they're fucking boring.

A lot of it isn't just because they're women, or unattractive, or whatever. Sure, I hate women, but that's only because they fall into a larger category known as "people." Don't get me wrong; I am not a simple misogynist, I am a misanthrope. The attractive thing really doesn't matter to me, because the Baywatch Principle comes into play. Even if there are some hotties running around, I'm not going to watch if the stuff beyond the T&A isn't interesting.

Another problem with women's sports for me is that they always let women play the most fucking uninteresting sports out there. Golf, soccer, basketball, you name it. I don't want to watch men play these sports.

Soccer is just fucking boring as shit to me, and I know it's not because of low scoring because I love hockey and 0-0 pitcher's duels. Actually, the only time I did get interested in soccer was women's soccer, when our team won the World Cup. That, however, failed to inspire me to watch more soccer, women's or otherwise. The same goes for men's basketball; I only enjoyed watching the Bulls play when they were good. Wasn't enough to get me interested in the sport in general.

The WNBA is a particular sore spot for me. Every year, around the same time, I ask my friends "Hey, did the WNBA finally fold?" only to find out that the new season starts in three days.

I probably speak for no one else, but you wanna know how to get me to watch women's sports? Give me something I've been clamoring for for a long time: women's baseball. No, I'm dead fucking serious. Check this out.

Major League Baseball has been pissing me off for years now. Mainly, because it's all about helping the hitter and fucking the pitcher. I could swear that the mound is nearly ground level now. New ballparks are being designed with smaller dimensions, older parks are having the fences moved in. Most likely rampant drug use is being ignored. At Fenway, they fucking lowered the green monster to add seats.

How often do you see guys steal bases anymore?

I just think it fucking sucks to see so many teams living and dying by the solo home-run. My solution? Kick it turn of the 20th century school, and bring back the dead ball. I know, not gonna happen.

So my other solution? Let women play baseball. I'm not talking about that softball bullshit, I mean real baseball. I know it won't happen in the big leagues, but it seems like it'd be feasible if not for all this patriarchal shit we have laying around. I could just be over-idealizing, and women wouldn't be able to make it in the Majors, but I doubt the possibility has been fully explored. And if breaking the sex barrier in the Majors doesn't happen, give the women their own league.

The thing is, I think women in baseball could be great hitters. And by hitters, I mean pure hitters who go for average and not power. Is there much more to hitting besides form, good eyesight, and good reflexes? I think female athletes could easily handle that. Plus, there would undoubtedly be power hitters as well, but we'd have a much better mix now to keep it from being all about the home run. Pitching is another issue, but I'm sure we can find some players out there who have some arm strength. Maybe not enough to pitch against men, so I definitely don't see that happening in the Majors. Defense and baserunning are more issues; against men it may be a mis-match, but straight women on women (and we all know how much we like to see that) teams would be no problem.

Again, don't give me any shit here, because I honestly don't know how well women athletes could compete against men. I have seen no studies, and have conducted no tests of my own. I'm just going with what little intuition and common sense that I have.

Oh, and if we do get women's baseball going, give them some real pants for their uniforms. I love looking at a nice pair of legs more than the next guy, but these women need to be able to slide, for Christ's sake.
Some people have too much time on their hands, and this is coming from me. I came across this example a long time ago, but for some reason was thinking about it today, and decided to post a link.
Yeah, I know the last few posts were nothing but meaningless complaints. I realize that I'm not helping anything just by bitching, and I certainly can't change the past. Really, though, I just don't want to let up on how shitty of a president Bush is. I don't want to start ignoring the fact that the Administration has gotten us into so much fucking trouble that it boggles the mind. Just hoping that there are other individual complainers out there, and with enough of us, we can make a chorus loud enough to be heard. I know it's a pipe dream, because no matter how pissed we managed to get people, the same dumb fuck voters will fall for the same campaign promises and the same attack ads come next November.

Oh, I know it isn't just the voters. I know I don't rail on Democrats anywhere near as much as Republicans, but I'll reiterate here that I fucking hate the Democrats, too. If nothing else, I hate them because they can't even behave like a worthy opposition. Among other reasons, I hate them because they are so fucking out of touch. Take for example Dick Gephardt, who's all incensed that we're not doing enough to get other countries to pitch and help out in reconstructing Iraq, and who is just trying to make himself look like big, bad Mr. Presidential candidate. What exactly is those other countries' motivation, dick? Yeah, it'd be nice if others would help out of the goodness of their hearts, but they're not going to since we have routinely given them the finger whenever they wanted a say in things. "You guys can have a say in things when we say so. Until then, go sit in the corner and don't touch anything France, Germany, and the rest of the fucking world." Do you know how much harder that makes it for people like Colin Powell to get shit done?

You know another thing, dick? We might not be having all these fucking problems if you and your fucking pussy congress buddies hadn't just handed over the decision to go after Iraq back in October. Lots of your Democrat buddies voted against it, but you sure didn't, dick.

Okay, yeah, Bush would have gotten his way no matter what, but did they have to make it so goddamn easy? Couldn't they have made it look like some people over here were pissed about this war? Made it look like we aren't all a bunch of rubber stamps for Bush? Because, really, that could help us with the rest of the world, if they didn't think that Emperor Bush was calling all the shots. Even though he is. Well, he really isn't; it's all the people working "under" him that are in charge. But you know what? Half of America doesn't know who the fuck Paul Wolfowitz is, and neither does the rest of the world. So, Bush becomes the face of evil who ends up representing not just his government, but all of us to the rest of the world. If we showed that we as a country could stand up to the neocon entity known as "Bush," maybe other countries would be more sympathetic towards us. Maybe they'd say "You know, those Americans are trying real hard to get their shit together, but that Bush keeps fucking it up. I don't want to look like I'm supporting Bush, but let's help those nice people in America out a little." instead of "What? Bush wants our help? Fuck America - they aren't getting shit."

Also, have you noticed how cool I am, and I know exactly what foreign leaders are saying? I totally feel like one of those baseball announcers who sees a meeting at the mound and says "Well, what he's saying to the pitcher is to scratch his balls some more and then spit on that newborn in the first row," when in fact they have no fucking clue what's being said on the field.
Too bad no one realized before the war that it might take a long time to rebuild Iraq.
It's a shame that no one could have predicted beforehand that rebuilding Iraq would be expensive.

Tuesday, August 26, 2003

Yeah, it sucks that no one saw that the tax cuts could potentially cause us so many problems down the road.
Yeah, this is a start, but nowhere fucking near what we need to prevent more Enrons and WorldComs. Why don't we start by taking a good, hard look at the accounting profession? As Arianna Huffington repeatedly points out in her book Pigs at the Trough, the same firm that does accounting work for a company can also do consulting work for that company. I'm sure that the implied conflict of interest is imaginary, and the consulting and accounting wings never work together to bolster the full company's bottom line.

Also, Michael Capellas has no business talking about "public trust." This is the man who let the company he was CEO of at the time, Compaq, get bought out by Hewlett-Packard. Don't let the papers fool you, this was a buyout and not a merger. Not long after the companies merged, Capellas left for, as we know, WorldCom. I have never worked for Compaq, so maybe it's just me, but I would have felt shit on if I were those former Compaq employees when Crapellas abandoned them. He was at least a face for their side, and a counterpart to Fuhrer Fiorina, HP's CEO. Once he left, that was shot to shit, and they were on their own. If they didn't get laid off, of course.
One thing that I hate more than anything is children in Vegas. My reasons are three-fold. First off, the kids are fucking miserable. They want to drink and gamble like mommy and daddy, but obviously can't. The Nevada Gaming Commission frowns upon stuff like that. Second, the adults are miserable - both the parents who have to haul their kids from $8 shitty rollercoaster to... $8 shitty rollercoaster, as well as the adults who were courteous enough to not bring any children. Finally, Vegas has to be the worst fucking place for a child. Drinking with no open container laws, gambling, whores - sounds like a real good environment for a child. Why don't you just dress your little boy up in an Abercrombie thong designed for a 10 year old girl and unleash him at a Catholic Priests' convention?

Bellagio has started getting the right idea - they have signs up saying no one under 18 is allowed in the hotel. That's a good start, but not good enough.

My solution? Card everyone once they get to the Vegas city limits. If they're under 21, they get stuck in a kennel for the weekend. You don't want your kids in the kennel, you can go home. It's your choice.

That being said, these people have taken things way too far. I mean, that is just fucked up.
When is this shit gonna end? I promise you, it should not be taking this long. Shit, you guys wanna give us a few sledgehammers and some traveling money? A couple friends and I will take that fucking thing down for you. We won't even care if religious groups boycott us.

I've gotten to the point where I know the monument is going to be removed (right?), and I'm not so up in arms about that issue, unless if they decided to keep it. Now, I'm more concerned with something really, really awful happening to Moore and all those highly effective people praying at the courthouse. Don't get nervous; I'm not going to do anything to bring that scenario on. But a man can dream, can't he?
You know the world is getting more militant and fucked up when the leader of Japan is saying they need more military might.
Okay, so this post may be a little confusing to some, since I'm going to talk about Friends and Lego, and it's most of it isn't complaints. I'll explain as we go along.

"Friends? Didn't you refer to Friends as shit just recently? What's up, you fucking hypocrite?" Yes, Friends is shit. However, Friends was brilliant during its first season and a half. I fucking loved the show until Ross & Rachel got together. I know what you're saying; "Oh, you just got pissed because you're angry, bitter, and cold-hearted and don't like to see any of that romance stuff." Well, if you take a look at my anime shelf and all the romantic comedies I've got on there, you'd think different.

No, the problem with Ross & Rachel getting together is that the show started to take itself too seriously after that. They just seemed to take all the fun out of the show, making this weird shift towards comedy+drama. I don't mind drama and romance mixed in with my comedy; in fact I welcome it if they're done right. Friends did not do it right, and they ruined a great show.

I just got the first season on DVD, and was reminded as to how great a show it really was. Everybody is funny, even Ross, and Chandler is just the fucking best. Classic episodes, like the Blackout Thursday episode, which was just the best episode of any sitcom ever. Plus, I was remimded of why I had a huge crush on Jennifer Aniston when the show was first on, because man oh man was she a hot number back then. I'm pretty sure I had at least one or two foolproof schemes worked out where we ended up married. Foolproof because, clearly, that's what a hot up-and-coming actress wants, some pathetic high school kid.

Anyway, now on with the Lego portion. There's a Friends reference in it, but I wanted to make sure it was put in proper context first.

So you're saying "Lego? I thought Lego was dead to you? What's up, you fucking hypocrite?" Well, have you paid attention to the shit Lego has been putting on store shelves recently? Like those stupid fucking sports Legos? How about the fact that Duplo blocks are still being made, but they aren't called "Duplo" anymore? And don't even bring up that Bionicle shit, because I will kill someone.

Still, even though the Lego Empire has seriously declined from the days of the Black Seas Barracuda, they do surprise me from time to time. For the most part, it's been a decent Star Wars set every now and then. However, they switched it up, by coming out with the Space Shuttle Discovery set. And I've gotta tell you, this one is fucking bad-ass.

I've been looking at some Lego sets as of late, and looking at the number of pieces they claim it has, and saying "Bullshit. There aren't 445 pieces in there; that's like 12." They claim the Discovery is 826 pieces, and after putting it together, I'd buy that. Sure, lots of them are really small pieces, but this thing took me 15 episodes of Friends to build. Like 6-6.5 hours. That's a fucking fun kit right there. One that takes so long your legs and back are all cramped up because you don't sit with good posture, then you do it for hours on end without moving because there's no way you're going to stop.

The end result is pretty big, being around 15.5" long with a wingspan of about 10.6". I've gotta give them credit for the complexity of some of the sub-assemblies, like the landing gear or the engine mountings. Yes, the landing gear actually works. Some mechanical engineering actually went into this thing, which impresses me. Both the wings and the tailfin have movable flaps. The cargo bay doors open to reveal a manipulator arm and storage space for the satellite that you build as part of the kit. It is just fucking bad-ass.

There are a couple of things I took issue with, but nothing major. There are decals for this kit, which is understandable but I always hate. For one thing, my surgeon's hands have real trouble keeping steady to put stickers on straight. Of course, I want them exactly straight. I'm bound to fuck up, and always end up with several stickers where one corner is bent and peeling because I did a bad application and had to pull off and re-apply the decal. This kit was no exception. Also, even though the satellite is way cool, I couldn't get it to fit in the cargo bay with the robot arm and the bay doors closed unless I removed the solar panels. Again, not a big deal. I can get it all in there and close the doors cleanly, so it's all good.

Another weird thing was the following. You know how Lego kits always used to have the main kit on the front of the box, and a bunch of alternate stuff you could build with the pieces on the back? Well, I haven't paid attention to other sets that are out nowadays, but this set didn't have that. There's an "Inspirational Booklet" as advertised by the box cover, and I thought maybe that's where alternate ideas would be. No, that was just more pictures of and facts about the real shuttle, and more pictures of the Lego kit itself. I'll tolerate it here; this thing is so cool that I don't know why you'd want to build anything else anyway. Hopefully they aren't doing that with all their sets now, implicitly telling kids to not be creative and just follow the given instructions.

One other thing in the inspiration booklet was pictures of some other kits that are either available or going to be availble. Among them is the moon mission set, which I'm totally stoked for, because the main portion of it is a Saturn V rocket. I don't know why, but when we were studying the moon missions back in grade school, I had a total hard-on for Saturn V rockets. I don't know why; maybe it was just me pre-emptively trying to overcompensate for future inadequacy.

Overall, this was a neat set. It looks great, and was a blast to put together. I've got some pictures of it here in case you really care. Oh, and even though I normally wouldn't, I think I should apologize for the tasteless joke in the last pic. I couldn't help myself.
Well, at least he doesn't have to go to church anymore with the ignorant fuckheads who killed him.
Oh, that's cool. I didn't realize we could just blame China for all this.
So, the guy who killed Father Boyfucker (why were people still calling him "Father"?) is still an asshole, but I'd say he's done at least one good deed for the week.

I've said before that we should just execute sex criminals, but this is one example as to why I don't mind just putting some of them in prison.

Monday, August 25, 2003

The author of this article brings up some good points about what shallow cunts we are as a society.

I, for one, can attest to how society fucks with your head. I know I'm not special or alone in this regard, but I don't think that makes me any less qualified to add to the discussion.

I developed a good sense of who I am sometime ago. Believe it or not, I like who I turned into. But still, you always feel like that's never good enough, mainly because it isn't. My main psychosis, which as you may have guessed is one of many, is being short. I'll give you an example as to how I've bought into the bullshit about height: as I was reading the teaser to that article, I got a little flutter of hope that they may have come up with a way to make adults grow taller without giving them special shoes or fucking killing them.

Here's the deal, again a "believe it or not": I don't see a fucking thing wrong with being short. Yeah, it doesn't exactly come in handy when I need to reach high places, but it'll make fitting into a sportscar all that much easier (once I'm living in fantasyland where I have a real fucking job). There are pros and cons. But I don't see why the fuck that has to do so much with being treated like an adult or catching someone's eye. The problem ends up not how I view myself, but how I feel others perceive me. And don't give me any shit that maybe I'm seeing myself as I truly think I am when I look through someone else's eyes. I'm not that fucking stupid. And, sure, my view of myself through others' eyes is probably skewed a lot of times. The problem is that, statistically speaking, my assessment is correct. And I know that it is - 24 years of being bombarded with the same crap will give you that impression. It's like certain stereotypes; you shouldn't believe in them, but if they're proved true often enough, they're hard to shake.

The thing is, when it comes to height, or whatever, we always come up with some bullshit excuse as to why other people have such a problem with it. Lots of times, the argument I usually hear is some pseudo-evolutionary argument that "people with trait X are viewed as being more capable, thus more able to attract a mate and send their genes on to the next generation." Yeah, well, if that's the case, then why are so many of us "deficient" people still around? No, you know what it is? Sick, shallow, American shit that makes people feel bad about things that they didn't choose and have little or no control over for no reason other than to show that we're so advanced that our biggest talent is making other people miserable. I'm not just talking about height, I'm talking about all sorts of shit, like were pointed out in that article. For all I know, it could be "sick, shallow, human shit," and I just haven't traveled the world yet to find out for sure. I'll get back to you once I find out.

Okay, I could go on and on about this, but I had better shut up before I really get pissed and lead you on a longer, more hellish journey through this dark corner of my mind. Yeah, I know that I've had the deck stacked against me in some regards, but not in others. Yes, I know that I can't always use this as crutch to avoid working on my issues, even though I know I do that. I'm just saying that society is a bitch, and it can fuck with you for a long, long time. That's all.
One can only hope. Of course, to paraphrase one of my favorite lines: you can hope all you want in one hand and shit in the other, and see which gets filled up first.
"Too inflamed?" Funny; those guys don't look pissed to me.

There are some other good quotes in there, too. Time's Verbatim is usually a quick and fun read.
So, I've added a new feature to the site once again. How will this benefit you, dear reader? It won't. It's a tool pretty much designed to give me info on people who come here, willingly or unwillingly. I don't know what "unwillingly" entails; I'm not sure if browser rape is something that happens very often. But it's on the rise.

Anyway, the new addition is a site meter, which tracks visits to this site. Among other things, it tracks the following:
  • number of pages viewed
  • referring page, if any
  • the viewer's domain (but NOT the viewer's IP)
  • length of stay
  • web browser
  • viewer's time zone
  • language

You can see the info that's tracked by clicking on the "Site Meter" button just below the archives if you're really curious.

Why the fuck am I telling you this? Well, we all know I'm a big fan of privacy, and I'd feel guilty if I didn't warn people about this. Why guilty? I don't know. It's not like I'm going to do anything malicious with the information. I don't think I could do anything malicious, seeing as how it doesn't give me IP addresses of individual machines, and of course doesn't harvest e-mail addresses or give you cancer (as far as I know).

The HTML code I'm using to track site statistics employs JavaScipt, and is offered by Site Meter. For all I know, they are collecting more info than I am able to view and doing malicious shit with it, but they'll probably fuck me before they fuck you. There is also a full HTML version of the tracker with no JScript, but that one isn't as much fun.

Keep in mind when you're browsing elsewhere that other sites have the capability to do stuff like this, they may be malicious, and they probably won't warn you up front. If any of this bothers you, you can always disable JavaScript in your browser (I think IE even allows you to do this), or start surfing through a web proxy.
Looks like another link has come into the fold.
Hey, I have an idea. We can keep the monument around, but next to it we're going to put a copy of the Koran and big statue of Buddha. How would you like that, fuckers? Huh?

Look, that stupid thing needs to be out of there, Buddha or no Buddha. This is just more self-righteous Christians trying to cram their mythology down our throats. Fuck, I made this post before getting to the end of the article. Someone even used my phrase there at the end, and it sounds like the quote was coming from a Christian.
So it's good to see more and more people making moves against the Patriot Act. The only disappointing thing is that it's taken nearly two years to build up a head of steam against it, but it's better than nothing. This is yet another thing we need to get more pissed about, so that we can keep it from happening again. Like it or not, large-scale terrorist attacks are a real possibility for the future. If we do have another major attack, and it occurs on Bush's watch, I can only imagine what the Administration's response will be. What we need both before and after attacks like September 11th are effective means of at least attempting to solve the issues at hand, and not legislation that looks like a fascist-style consolidation of power.
Here's an overview of what kind of a mess we currently have in Iraq, and some suggestions on fixing it. A lot of the suggestions are good sense, and ones we've been hearing for awhile. The problem is, a lot of it is easier said than done. That hasn't stopped us from making good on difficult situations in the past, but in the past, we didn't have the administration that we have today.

Also, is the WMD thing pretty much a done deal, and everyone is convinced that the Administration was completely full of shit? I hear next to nothing about WMD anymore, even less than before, and not even many complaints. If people are satisfied that all of the WMD hype was just that, hype, then why the fuck aren't people getting pissed about it? Why aren't we taking to the streets, angry because we've gotten ourselves into a mess that we never should have gotten into, and now can't leave?

I know showing that the justifications for getting involved in "Son of Gulf War" were total bullshit lies won't change the facts of what we have done and that we can't leave until we get things together over there. But I want people to see that the Administration does nothing but lie and bullshit its way into doing whatever it wants, and I want people to rise up next time they try and do something this fucking stupid. We can't change what's already happened, but we can keep it from happening again if we just fucking pay attention and yell at our government like Cartman would. "No Bush administration that's a bad Bush administration!"
Holy hell, and I thought I woke up feeling depressed this morning.
Okay, ADV, I think our relationship has progressed to the point where it's time that we sit down and had a talk.

You have fucked me out of plenty of money buying your DVDs this past year. I'm OK with that; you have me hooked, and I will continue buying your DVDs because the junkie needs his fix. This venture into toys, which we've heard announced at least twice now, threatens to add a wrinkle that could potentially put some strains on our relationship. You sit poised on the brink of being able to do something great - to make cool, high-quality anime-related toys. Please, get good licences. Please, hire some good people who will give us quality sculpts. Please, use quality materials, and show some quality control. And please, let there be lots of accessories and playsets. If you build it, and it is good, I will buy it.

Also, please consider NOT using McFarlane style packaging. You know, that shitty plastic tomb motif they've come up with that requires a chainsaw and the jaws of life to liberate my toys. If you make good shit and use McFuckhead packaging, I'll still buy it, but your not using McFuckhead packaging would be a nice gesture that goes a long way in showing that you take our relationship seriously.
Christ, do I hope this trend continues. As much as I'd love to see Arianna Huffington or Larry Flynt running California, I know Arnold (pronounce it as Ahhhhh-nold if you want; other than this example I fucking refuse to type it that way) is going to win if it goes to a vote.

Okay, I guess I'm kinda like the Californians with regards to Larry Flynt - they want Arnold because he's famous, and I'd love to see Flynt in office mainly because he's a smut peddler. Well, OK, it goes further than that. I wouldn't want Hugh Hefner as Governor, partly because Playboy isn't smut, it's just crap. Plus, Hef would probably fill all governmental positions with unattractive, huge-titted platinum blondes. Fuck, he'd probably just deport any woman who didn't fit that profile from California. Wait, that could be good, because maybe some of those women would move to my state...

Fuck, anyway, I'm getting off track. The last thing I need is more women around, especially attractive ones, because as I was recently reminded that scenario just leaves me depressed. God damn it, I'm getting sidetracked again.

Ok. Larry Flynt. Why he would be cool as governor if Arianna, my first choice, didn't win.

First off, Larry Flynt puts out a quality product. To me, that counts. I've never had a Hustler subscription, but I've made plenty of questionable purchasing decisions that left me muttering "I should've just gotten a subscription to Huster instead." We could use more magazines like Larry's in this day and age of shit like Maxim. Here, however, I'll have to confess that I once had a subscription to Stuff, which was such a piece of shit that I hated it when I even liked those other crummy magazines. I currently have subscriptions to Maxim (which is nearly done, I'm not renewing and have ripped up any re-subscribe mail I've gotten), FHM (ibid), and Playboy (don't know how many issues are left on the current subscription; haven't decided on renewal because I've got nearly every issue since 1999, when the Playmates were what they should be, amazingly hot, and I don't know if I can bring it upon myself to end the streak). Anyway, I'm thinking of taking the money I pull out of Maxim, FHM, and Playboy and re-invest it in Hustler. And I'm going to need it; Hustler subscriptions are fucking expensive. Then, once I do that, I can start complaining that "I should've just gotten a subscription to Perfect 10 instead."

Fuck. Sorry, I didn't expect this to become a diatribe on men's and porno magazines. So, it's been established that I have respect for Larry's business. That brings me to another Flynt selling point, in that he has run a successful business. That know-how may be useful in a state that is facing a budget crunch. Business and otherwise, Larry Flynt doesn't fuck around. Nothing put a smile on my face during the Lewinsky mess quite like when Larry went after all the fucking Republicans leading the impeachment effort, exposing them for the tail-chasing assholes that they were. Of course, let us not forget Flynt's First Amendment credentials. In this day and age of "you'd better watch what you say," it's nice to see someone who still understands one of our most basic and most important rights.

Finally, Larry Flynt wouldn't be a half bad idea as governor because the guy is clearly more open-minded than most politicians. I just don't see him as having a lot of the hangups and issues that every other politician has that keeps him or her from being effective. Flynt would take charge, do what he thought was right, and not give a shit as to what other people thought. Also, the citizens of California might be able to get some sort of government subsidy for buying pornography.
Well, that was a quick trip. Why the fuck did we even bother to send the 41st Token Regiment in the first place?

Sunday, August 24, 2003

I want to buy one of these, reverse engineer it, and teach the little brat to say bad words.