Jesus fucking Christ the world is lame. I just cannot find anything that I feel like posting about, but Google and its ilk march on. So here's this.

alien monsters raping schoolgirls

The immigration debate rages on.

how much did sasha cohen weigh when she was a baby

The fact that someone was looking for that information is disturbing, and this is coming from me.

Spam:

If she says that you have a small dick, dont respond with an answer No,
@fter y0u take Penis Enlargement V1rility Patch PX she would think that she is being fucked by a horse, not human.
http://chapdismal.com/pp/?WvAkmJ

Okay, there are so many things wrong with this spam that it's hard to decide where to start. First off, "don't respond with an answer"? What else can I respond with, a walking stick? Birthday cake? What the fuck? Oh, and if a girl says you have a small dick, that's not really something she's looking for an answer to. It's a statement of fact from her point of view, and there's nothing you can say or do about it. How exactly is it that you "take" a patch? Where would one apply this patch, anyway? Do you put it on your arm like one of those smoking patches, or on your dick? Seems like it's gonna fall off easily if you put it on your dick, but then again, how's it gonna be effective if you place it anywhere else? What if you ended up with one arm that was, like, huge, and the other still scrawny? That's not gonna get you laid; you need two big arms like Ludacris. Once you're there you can get a big watch, too. Then there's the claim that she'll think she's being fucked by a horse, not a human. Most girls, I think, are going to have a problem with that. Most. And finally, I like that URL -- chapdismal.com. Because if chicks are telling you that you have a small dick, you are clearly going to be a dismal chap.

sulu hated shatner

Damn, Shatner is such a dooshebag that even the imaginary characters hated him. Either that or this person doesn't know that Sulu isn't real.

teens girls fuck big dig

Why would you be doing a search, and furthermore expecting results, for teens fucking a major Boston-area highway construction project? Jesus, assholes: SPELL CHECK YOUR FUCKING PERVERT GOOGLE SEARCHES. I'm tired of this shit.

trent reznor pretty hate machine what does it mean

It means you're an idiot. Extra points deducted because your search rhymes.

Do other cultures Mastubate

This comes across weird in two ways. One, I don't really think of masturbating as a cultural thing, and more of a "horny people thing." Second, this can come across as culture itself masturbating, which doesn't make sense either. Well, until I think about our so-called "culture" in this particular country, and yeah, that's masturbation. And not good masturbation, either, which is pathetic when you really think about it.

how to fuck a girl with a strapon

You put on a strapon... And you fuck her. It's not that difficult, professor.

how to fuck girlfriend in bathtub

God damn it; you get her in the tub, and you fuck her. If strapons and bathtubs are so complicated, I beg you, please stop having sex. And kill yourself.

honey let's fuck your friend

Yeah, I'm sure that'll go over real well.

swallowing my husband's cum improves my moods

Everybody wins! I'll bet this is actually just a husband's wishful thinking, though, and not the wife herself. Although a woman may enjoy swallowing, my guess is the main thing that would be helping to improve her mood is getting her husband to finally shut up about it.

flaming red assholes

You might wanna get that checked.