Here's the latest sign that Playboy has gone downhill: Hef is now doing commercials for Carl's Junior. I can't totally rip on the ads, though, because the tag line is pretty good. "Carl's Junior: Because some guys don't like having the same thing night after night."

Also, they've got Shannen Doherty naked in the magazine this month. Why is she still around? She must be running out of money. Also, I'm now convinced that that Shannen Doherty chick has a dong.

Here's why. I remember when she was first in Playboy, back in like '95 or something. I had gotten a look at the issue, and this one friend of mine was asking me about the pictorial. To give you an idea as to the quality of this kid, his main question was something along the lines of "What color is her pussy?" I'm not really sure why he cared about the color of her pubic hair, seeing as how it's not like there's a question as to whether or not she's a natural blonde. The carpet most likely matches the curtains, or is at least fairly close.

Anyway, I thought about it for a sec, and I'm like "You know what? I don't even think they showed it." So he was disappointed to not get a description of Shannen Doherty's goodies.

The latest pictorial has a tagline of "Hollywood's hottest drama queen has nothing to hide." Ignoring the fact that "hottest" is debatable nowadays with Doherty, I think the tagline is a complete lie. Doherty has something to hide, alright, and that something is a penis. Once again, I could not give any sort of description as to what is or is not between her legs and what color it is, because, once again, it's all covered up.

As such, wherever this onetime friend of mine is now, he is still living in disappointment. Actually, considering that Shannen has man junk down there, he's probably going to be happier this way.