With a heavy dose of fear and violence, maybe we can get some people to use the god damn message board

Okay, so the Fe messageboard is a dismal failure. This doesn't come as a huge surprise, seeing as how I'm in charge of it and have put little to no effort into it.

The problem is, I do put a decent amount of effort into this goddamn fucking piece of shit 'blog. What the hell else do I have to do for you people? After setting up the board, Sarah immediately pointed out that no one would do shit until I started posting some stuff. She was right (and, as she pointed out, is always right), of course, but what the fuck is that? I mean, look at this 'blog. It looks like a bunch of fucking posts to me! I'm supposed to shit out 15 posts in one day and then try and fire up discussion elsewhere? Even I don't have that kind of stamina in the bullshit department.

My hopes were that posts would be the starting point, bleed over into comments, and then maybe migrate to the board. Just like everything else in Frank's life, this did not pan out.

So, I have a question: why is the messageboard being neglected like the unwanted child of Fe? Do people just not give a shit? If that's the case, I can totally understand - we all know just how much of a shit I give about... everything. I know there are some people out there who like to shoot their mouths off just like I do, though. The thing is, I want more people shooting their mouths off here. We have some intelligent, humorous commenters who I'd like to hear more from. I'd like to hear more commentary and opinion besides my own. No, really.

I suspect that some people may be afraid to say anything on the messageboard. There's a real common misconception about me that I automatically treat everyone like shit upon coming in contact with them. I remember when I got my first job working at a retail store, someone asked "So, does he just say 'fuck you' to all the customers who come in?" I am obviously not very skilled socially, but I do have a grasp of the basics. My usual policy is not to treat anyone poorly until I think they've done something to warrant poor treatment. I'm not perfect at this, but better than one might think. And no, simply being there is not typically a reason I use for being an asshole to someone. I can totally understand where this misconception comes from, but just trust me when I say that it's not right.

Just like Fermat's Last Theorem, nobody really understands me. I suppose it's possible that this has cropped up here at Fe as well as at the messageboard. Some people may be afraid I'm going to jump all over their ass for saying anything, especially if it's dissent. Of course, I can understand this if that's the case. We all remember And Prowse, who came here spewing homophobic garbage which I just ended up ridiculing. As long as you can do better than 1950s studies to back up what you're saying, I'm not going to be a total bastard to you for whatever you say, even if it's disagreement. Really.

I almost feel arrogant thinking this may be an issue, but since I have been called intimidating in the real world at least once, I can't ignore the possibility. I promise you, if anything ever got really bad, each and every one of you could kick my ass. Old people, retards, everyone. Furthermore, I do a great job of talking and bullshitting when I'm in my own personal sphere, but (as may have been noticed on occasion), I'm pretty weak when it comes to actually arguing and interacting with others. I need a some challenge, even if that challenge leaves me running away crying.

And what's the worst-case scenario? You say something I disagree with, and I rip you a new one. Oh effing well. It's not like I murdered your firstborn or something. Stop being such a god damn pussy.

Looking back, the hostile nature of this plea was probably not the way to go. But honestly, would anyone have bought some sort of flowery "pretty please" post? That would have come across as totally fake and disingenuous, and I respect you all more than that.

Seriously, I do want to hear what others have to say. Whether it's agreement or disagreement with something I've said, or something completely different from what I've been saying, let's hear it. I know people have interesting stuff on their minds. Okay, so yeah, lots of them have 'blogs of their own when it comes to the "completely different" department, but I know people have opinions and stuff to add when it comes to my topics.

What would really be nice is if the messageboard could take on a life of its own, driven more by others as opposed to me. Not to say that I'll keep my mouth shut entirely, since that is clearly not one of my strong suits, at least not here.

So, unless if you're just apathetic towards the idea, hit the messageboard. I'll try and think of something to create more of a spark. In the end, I really wanna get some varied opinion and further discussion going on out there. Help me out. Please?

See? I told you no one was going to buy that.