Clittin'

I watched Clinton's big 60 Minutes interview last night. It was pretty much what you'd expect - a "who's who" of Clinton's lies and him talking about it. Yeah, I know, that was a new fact that came out in the piece - Clinton was a liar. Rumor has it that all politicians are liars. So many of Clinton's lies still don't bother me, at least not on the order of lies like, say, Iraq poses an immediate threat to the United States.

Conservatives are already bemoaning the beginning of the "Summer of Clinton." Naturally, this makes me smile because I know how much it makes them burn anytime Clinton gets the slightest bit of attention. Rush should be back to popping pills any day now if he hasn't started already.

One right-wing theory that has been posited is that Clinton is timing his book tour in order to overshadow this year's election and actually hurt Kerry. The ultimate goal being, supposedly, to keep Kerry from winning so that Hillary can run in 2008 for balls-out President (and I do mean balls in every sense of the word) and help put to rest all of this VP talk nonsense.

I'd say the theory has some weight. It's at least not out of the realm of possibility. If Kerry wins this year, it wouldn't be until 2012 before Hillary could run as the head of a Democratic ticket (assuming, of course, that Kerry gets through his term and runs for re-election). And you know Bill is up for helping her out. "Yeah, Bill, the Monica thing did help me in the long run, but you still fucking OWE me." Besides, it gets Clinton the attention he so desires, along with, of course, the money.

Despite being a non-Clinton worshipping Clinton fan, this would piss me off if it were true. Part of my love for Bill and Hillary stems from the core belief that they do everything they can to get what they want, but they don't do it in a manner that fucks the entire country. Okay, some people would definitely argue that point, but I don't see them getting us involved in any fucking wars just to get paid. Sure, they might kill a person or two, but hey - that's politics. Costing Kerry the election would, for me at least, fall under the umbrella of "fucking the country."

Then again, Kerry does suck, and he's most likely going to lose this election all on his own. And of course, the notion that Bill and Hillary could "cost" Kerry the election is an exaggeration - they alone couldn't bring him down even if they wanted to, and they would know this. But still, Kerry needs all the help and as little of the detraction as he can get.

This, as always, brings me back to the unhappiness over feeling compelled to support John Kerry. I have way more confidence in Hillary as president than Kerry as president, but I still have a lot more confidence in Kerry than Bush. I'm just not in the mood to take the gamble of Kerry losing so Hillary can get in four years sooner, which of course leaves us with four more years of Bush. And, hey, the way I look at it, all politicians are corrupt assholes, but at least Kerry doesn't come packaged with Paul Wolfowitz. Hopefully.

In the end, though, I'm not too hot and bothered over this little theory. You never know just what the Clintons are up to.