Blogger is replacing banner ads at the top of 'blogs with a new tool bar for searching the 'blog you're reading. And it's... Completely fucking useless. Search my site for "fuck" and it returns all of 45 results. Yeah, as it turns out, my language is much cleaner than I thought it was. Fucking cunts.

What else is going on that I don't give a fuck about? The Olympics. Holy hell, I have never given less of a shit about the Olympics than I do this year. Not that I'm ever all that big on the Olympic games, but still. Normally there's some interest, but not this year. All I wanna know is when figure skating is on.

Maybe I'll garner some interest if I catch some women's gymnastics, just because I (and I'm sure I'm not alone) have a bit of a thing for gymnasts. And no, not because they look like children, but, well, okay, because they look like children. I'm a big proponent of trading going through puberty for mad athletic skills.

Okay, it's already too late to get myself out of trouble, but fuck it. Yes, it is neat that so many gymnasts are so tiny even when they're older and perfectly legal. You know what I could do with a girl who's really short? I could be taller than her, that's what, and that never fucking happens. At least not once they get past the age of, oh, nine. Although my pedophile jokes may seem to imply otherwise, it would be nice to find someone a little closer to my age. Anyway, I have no inborn need to be taller (being down at buffet level has its advantages, if only I could ever put them to use), but it seems to be a bullshit requirement. I'm only trying to be practical here.

Another thing about gymnasts is, of course, the flexibility. Same thing with dancers. You know what I could do with that flexibility? Hell if I know, but it'd probably be neat.