The week wouldn't be shit without some random crap from Japanese tabloids.

Here's an artist's life that I could get into.

So you mean to tell me that with all the time that I've wasted pretending to be a girl in IRC rooms, I could have been making money doing basically the same thing? Oh, and I will never get over that term "soup man."

Finally, something new to think about on our next sushi outing or when we order takeout.