So I was trolling around Everything and came across this piece of shit. Even though it's just the ignorant rambling of one dumbass, it's strongly reminiscent of a lot of the pseudo-logic I've heard the religious in general, and the Christians in specific, use to justify their beliefs. You don't really need to click that link; I've repeated all its points in verbatim below. Let's get it on.

1. Are you sure God doesn't exist? You are willing to contend, aren't you, that there is a tiny chance that God does exist? If you don't believe in him, and he DOES exist, you're screwed. You HAVE A CHOICE. When the day comes to choose who enters Heaven, it is highly doubtful you will be chosen, if you don't believe. Isn't it safer just to believe?
   
   This is one of the stupidest arguments for belief that I've ever heard. Mainly, because this isn't belief, it's just playing it safe. Don't you think God is going to see through your bullshit? Isn't he fucking God? If Christian mythology were true, wouldn't you get up to Heaven, and when God asks if you believe in him, and you say "Yes, of course, I professed my belief all the time!" And then God would be like "Lying asshole. That's what you said, but not what you thought. Go to Hell. Go directly to Hell, do not pass go, do not collect 200 pieces of silver."
   
   Also, I think that if a god does exist, he's going to recognize the fact that, yes, I do have a choice. And if I decided not to believe in him, and he really does exist, he'll understand, because I'm a fucking human, and we tend to make mistakes. Furthermore, I'd at least like to think he's not as petty and unforgiving as we are.
   


2. So you have moral dilemmas? They're annoying, aren't they? What is right and what is wrong? Who knows? The law? Crap, you cross the street at a red light. God knows what is right and what is wrong. Believe, and all your moral problems are solved. If you are ever stuck again with a moral dilemma, just ask your local priest, rabbi or equivalent. He'll explain it all to you.
   
   In the words of George Carlin, I have this moron thing I do; it's called "thinking." Among other things, this "thinking" allows me to solve my own moral dilemmas, but thanks anyway. They may be annoying, but I'm not going to cop out and let someone else decide for me. Sure, I don't solve dilemmas with divine efficiency, but if you look at all the wars and other killing in God's name, God isn't all that good at solving moral dilemmas either.
   


3. You have sinned, you know. And you DO know it. Even if you don't call it sin. So you call it "a mistake". But you can't forgive yourself. God knows you've tried. You can't forgive yourself. Well, if God can forgive you, you'll be able to forgive yourself too. All the major religions have methods of forgiveness.
   
   Have you ever noticed that all the things that we consider fun are also the things that get denounced as sin? Gambling, drinking, killing, fucking. You name it; if it's something we can't live without, it's a sin. This just sounds like a bullshit scam to me; a scam by the puritans to keep everyone as miserable and uninteresting as they are.
   
   And you know what? I'm a big enough person that I can forgive myself all on my own. Other people can forgive me, too. What difference does it make if you're fucking doggy style and you "accidentally" land in the wrong hole, and then god forgives you? Try that "Oh, honey, it's all good, God forgave me!" bullshit and watch when that doesn't erase the incident or make the person or their asshole feel any better.
   


4. Can you explain infinity? I can't. I'm talking about two dimensions of infinity. Spacial and temporal. Talk quantum mechanics, and dimension folding all you like, the human mind can never grasp it. I don't think anyone can comprehend infinity. If you believe in God, no problem.
   
   Do you even know what things like "infinity," "spacial" (sic), "temporal," and "dimension folding" mean? And if the human mind can't grasp it, then how does God help you figure it out? Do we just pretend that he knows what it is, and since someone else knows, that's good enough for us? This argument is the biggest load of crap I've ever heard - it doesn't mean a fucking thing.
   


5. You can't possibly believe that evolution theory completely. Oh, I'll agree, natural selection exists. Of course it does. Creation theory does not conflict with the belief in natural selection, don't make any mistakes. Of course, many people believe it does, but that's mostly because they are misinformed. Natural selection hardly explains Man. And where is that missing link? You can't possibly believe that Man (a conscious being) originated from the monkey, which is so far below him?
   
   This is like one of my all-time favorite things to hear religious people babble about. These fuckers are so narrowminded and so limited that they can't understand a concept like "millions and millions of years." They seem to think that one day, all of a sudden, a monkey gave birth to a human baby. They don't fucking understand that it has been millions and millions of fucking years of random genetic mutations and natural selection that got us from monkey to man. Also, don't get so fucking cocky about man being so much more developed than monkeys. Monkeys may fling shit at eachother, but they don't waste their lives watching "Must See TV" or watching animals fling their shit at eachother.
   
   Oh, and where is the missing link? It's missing, you fucking dumbass. It's very nature is defined by what we call it. Christ, a fucking monkey could figure that out.
   


6. What happens when we die? Scary, isn't it? Don't you have a soul? Of course you do. You can't possibly, deep in your heart believe that we just die and disintegrate? There has to be an afterlife.
   
   Actually, it's not that scary. There's a good chance there's no afterlife, and if that's the case, I won't fucking care when I'm dead, because I can't. If there is an afterlife, then I'll fucking deal with it once I'm there and I have some facts to work with. Death is only scary to the living. Do I believe, deep in my heart, that I will just die and disintegrate? No, I don't fucking know what will happen. And you know what? I'm OK with that. Of course I have a soul? What is that based on? There has to be an afterlife? What is that based on? Nothing, and nothing. It's all bullshit made up by living humans just to make themselves feel better.
   
   People think they're so fucking important that there has to be an afterlife so they can continue all the important things they're doing here on earth, like working jobs they hate so they can buy shit they don't need. Bullshit. This world would be a lot better, I think, if more people would realize that when they die, not a fucking thing happens. The world goes on just fine without you, and save a handful of people, no one will give a shit when you're gone. End of story. Get over yourself.
   


7. The bible contains predictions of the future. Many predictions have already happened, so if you are a disbeliever, you can see for yourself. No other book in the world has so many prophetic words and codes interwoven into it as the bible. Many experiments have shown this. Coincidence?
   
   No, taking shit out of context, thinking about it for a real long time, and then twisting it around to make it look prophetic.
   
   While we're on the subject, isn't there some prophecy about a certain you-know-who returning after a couple of millennia? What happened to that prediction?
   


8. The world today is full of pornography and gore and is low on moral fiber. You know it's wrong. And you sure as heck don't want your children to grow up in such a society. The return to morals is the only solution, and the only way to do that is through BELIEF.
   
   Actually, I don't want my children to grow up in a society of such ignorance. God help you if I actually do have children, because they will have a healthy and realistic attitude about things like pornography and gore. Kids whose parents think like this, meanwhile, will be terrified to even masturbate. Also, where exactly did we abandon morals? According to this argument, we must have, otherwise we wouldn't be returning to them. I can think of a good three or four people just off the top of my head who have a good moral center. Counterexample, fuckhead. The point is nil.
   


9. Most of the world does, in fact, believe in God. How could this be, if God didn't exist? If you've strayed off the path, you must return to it. Everyone was born capable of believing in God. Some haven't found Him yet, others have lost Him. He WILL take you back.
   
   How could this be? Maybe because people are fucking stupid? The notion that God must exist simply because people believe in him shows that God is just a human creation.
   
   Also, as someone else pointed out in response to this post, a lot of people in the world belive in a god or gods, and not necessarily capital-G Christian God. There's nothing I can say to the "born capable," "still haven't," and "take back" portions of this statement, because they're completely empty and meaningless.
   


10. Look deep inside your heart. God is there.
    
    OUCH, THAT HURT YA BUTTLICKER!!!!! Looking inside my heart, all I can find is a bunch of tissue, vessels, and blood! And great, now I'm about to fucking die, so I can find out the answer to that afterlife bullshit. Thanks.