Poor little rich boy.

Geez, working in the White House has gotta suck now, eh? Women have to wear skirts below the knee? Sure, micro-minis probably aren't appropriate for the seat of the United States government, but Christ, what a bunch of repressed motherfuckers.

You know, I was walking behind a pretty girl today wearing a nice skirt. And I was thinking to myself "I like skirts. Long ones, short ones, medium length ones. It's all good." And yes, you can see the quality of my thought processes right there. But I've realized more and more that I'd really like to have a girlfriend, if nothing else, to dress her up in nice things. I think this desire is pretty obvious from my beauty pageant ideas.

Okay, granted, I wouldn't exactly be the one dressing her up; she's obviously going to be making her own choices. But if she has good taste (which is basically a pre-req), it'll almost seem like I have some control. "Hey, I would have picked that one out!"

You know, I just cannot imagine why women don't go for me.